It's not even 11 p.m. yet and you could wipe the floor and the counter with me. I got brave (because Jono was so good on our outing together the other day) and took him shoe shopping and out to get a haircut today. Boy, was that dumb. Wait, I don't think I spelled that loud enough. Boy was that D-U-M-B! Could you hear me that time? Oh my, did he put on a performance!
I only needed a pair of sandals for him. Do you think that anyone carried a pair of sandals in that boys size? NO! At least not the first three places we stopped -- and it only took three for me to get it, because I am not totally stupid! He was half-decent in the first store, barely decent in the second and since I am describing his behavior using the word "decent" I would have to say he was "nekked as a jay-bird" in the third store! Seriously though, about the only thing he didn't do was strip off his clothes!
Target was our third and last store. I think the only target he saw was the one on my back that said "SUCKER!" I put a pair of shoes on him; got them all fastened and asked him to stand up so I could look at them. He gave me that "Hahaha! Mom--Daddy isn't here to make me behave!" look and took off like he was a track star! I tried yelling for him to stop with no effect so I had to run over to the cart and grab my purse before I could go into full pursuit mode. He's much shorter than all the racks; so he's hard to see when he doesn't want you to see him. Remember, he thinks this is a game now. I start following the laughter and giggles. (Hee hee! Mommy's chasing me!) Finally, we are in front of the registers--no racks. He's running fast and I'm after him fast but he's far away. I can see this isn't going to work because he's going to turn and run out the doors into the parking lot before I reach him. YIKES!
THANK HEAVENS for child psychology! I stop dead in my tracks and say: "Bye Jono, Mommy's going home! I'm leaving." I glance up just enough to see if he heard--and he did. I start moving quickly in the other direction. He is running hard to catch up. I move faster. He moves faster. Finally, just when he thinks he is going to catch up--I CATCH HIM!
I am mad at him; but more grateful at that moment to have him safe in my arms. I leave everything in the cart and leave the store with my boy just so glad to have him--and so ready to take him home and give him the nap he needs. His next outing may be when he is 13--or at least when Mommy has had a full-night's sleep which will be somewhere in that vicinity.
p.s. I went out later this evening and bought sandals without him. I figured if they didn't fit, I could always take them back. :)